Young women often fall into the trap of thinking they’re constantly stuck in some kind of intermediate state, waiting until the day they actually “have a life”. The problem is that this mindset never goes away. The perfect formula for happiness just keeps changing. The cycle goes something like this:
A young woman spends her days and nights dreaming of Prince Charming. And once he finally comes along she sits around drumming her fingers, wondering when he’s going to put a ring on one of them. After a few weeks the excitement wears off and a new season of discontentment sets in: The Engagement. After a few months, the big day arrives after all, and with it the promised marital bliss. Ah, marriage at last. But the discontentment doesn’t end there either. Before long her attention has moved from the home décor section to the children’s department. But when the sweet little baby that is going to fulfill her life arrives, she soon wishes he were older and more independent. And when her child grows older, she finds a new set of problems, and so a new set of reasons to look forward to the next phase. Unfortunately, that new phase brings more problems of its own. At long last, she gets to the end of her days and finds herself discontent with the life she’s lived.
Whatever it takes to make your dreams come true, whether it’s marriage and children, or just being a little better off, the story always ends the same. Putting our hope and happiness in our circumstances only leads to never-ending dissatisfaction. The grass only seems greener on the other side.
I’m not saying some stages of life aren’t to be desired more than others. Marriage is way better than engagement, but it’s not always rainbows and butterflies. If we spend each phase grumbling and longing for the next we’ll miss what God has planned and is doing now. The problem is that we don’t trust the goodness of God’s plan. The heart of our discontentment is unbelief.
And so the answer to our never-ending discontentment is to cultivate real faith. Faith is the assurance of things hoped for and the conviction of what we do not see (Heb. 11:1). Our faith isn’t to be placed in our hope that the next best thing will fulfill us. Our satisfaction lies in God. God is a wise Father, knowing the end from the beginning (Is. 46:10). He has planned all of our days. He planned everything for our welfare and not for evil (Jer. 29:11). He has ordained each stage of life and each momentary affliction to bring us to something much bigger than the next point on the line. He is bringing us to Himself, and our hearts will never be content until they rest in that promise. The only day we should long for is the day we get to be with Him.

Comments
I agree, Amanda! Thanks for
I agree, Amanda! Thanks for writing this.
Thank you for this, Amanda.
Thank you for this, Amanda. It is so true that we are constantly searching for the next stage.
In the last few years of high school, as I anticipated college coming, I remember thinking that once I got there, I would be more self-disciplined and bolder in my witness, because — well, I'm not really sure why I thought that. But lo and behold, I got here and my procrastination, laziness, and fear of man have not disappeared. If anything, they've been magnified!
I think that wrapped up in my discontent in this stage is an unwillingness to do what God has for me to do. I think to myself, "This stage is awful and if I can just push through it, then I'll be able to do the things I'm supposed to. Once I'm {in college, married, a mother, etc.}, then I'll be able to be godly. But right now? That's just not possible." In truth, it is precisely the things that I'm supposed to be doing now that will grow me so that I can be a godly {college student, wife, mother, etc.}, and refusing to do those things will only breed discontentment in every stage of my life.
Very welcome wisdom, Amanda.
Very welcome wisdom, Amanda. Discontent is one of Woman's pet sins, I've found. It certainly has been one of mine. And, yes, faith--in the work of the Holy Spirit within us, in the completed work of Jesus Christ on the cross, and in the Father's benevolence toward those He has elected--is the only answer to this besetting sin that afflicts so many of us.
Amen. I think all of us see
Amen. I think all of us see this in ourselves, no matter what phase of life we are in. I always want to live in the future and take great pleasure in planning, dreaming, and idealizing what it will be like. Afterall, it sounds great to others to talk about what I will do in the future, where I will go next, how I will be serving God. However, when I get to the future, the ideal gets shattered, I and everyone around me are still sinners, and I'm not in heaven yet. Longing for something better, something more rich, something more satisfying is part of our life here. When we come to terms with the fact that we won't find it here, that our whole life will be filled with this longing and that it won't be satisfied until we reach our homeland of heaven, then we can learn to be content in sickness and health, in plenty or in want, as a mom or a barren woman, in marriage or singleness.
Thank you for writing this,
Thank you for writing this, Amanda!
"He has ordained each stage
"He has ordained each stage of life and each momentary affliction to bring us to something much bigger than the next point on the line. He is bringing us to Himself..." Thank you for putting that so well, Amanda.
As I work to cultivate true faith, my temptation is to pull up my bootstraps and become a better believer in God's goodness, forgetting that His goodness to me very much includes the forgiveness of my sins of discontent. Confessing my particular sins and seeing them under the blood seems always to be the beginning of truly believing in God's goodness and being content in particular circumstances. Thanks and praise indeed to God for the work of the Holy Spirit within us, the completed work of Jesus Christ on the cross, and the Father's benevolence toward those He has elected.
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